My Editor Ate Me
I got my edited manuscript back the other day, along with instructions designed by a Demon-In-Training on what to do with the comments. I can see why I paid 2 cents a line. There's at least one comment on every single one of the lines in one hundred and ninety eight pages.
Am I laughing yet? Trooper that I am, I started editing the edits. After three hours, I had completed twenty out of one hundred and ninety eight pages. No matter that I was watching Boston (home sweet home) get its a** kicked by New York/Jersey (barf! puke! retch!) in the playoffs, I'm sure I wasn't distracted. I'm also sure the Editing Monster was eating my soul.
I will have to:
- find my soul and put one of those antibiotic bandaids on it
- quit watching the playoffs
- go to church and pray the Editing Monster falls on hard times (if they even let me into the church; it's been a while
- pluck out an eyeball
- wait...I need it to read the edits
- maybe I can do them with one eye
- quit bitching
- and just do the damned edits.
Interesting side note: editors certainly do their job with zeal. Not only were typos and capitalizations corrected, the editor changed words here and there to conform to proper usage. I can see her point, but good grief, if I were into proper usage I would:
- not be a writer
- would wear hats and go to church more often
- would lose my writer's voice
- and would definitely pluck out an eyeball
- because I wouldn't need it anymore.
Or ... you could hire a clerk to make the editing corrections whilst you lie on the sofa eating bon-bons. Ah the life of luxury awaits ... but it'll cost you! :P
ReplyDeleteSnark, snark, snark.....now the work of publishing begins. And you thought it was easy. The one thing I think is that it will be worth it... for your readers. I know, I'm one.
ReplyDeleteThey make you walk the gauntlet, but hopefully they'll be a plum of a deal at the end.
ReplyDelete